by Rasamanjari devi dasi

Dearest Srila Gurudeva,

Nama Om Vishnu Padaya Krishna Presthaya Bhutale
Srimate Gour Govinda Swami Iti Namine!

Namaste Gouranga Prema Datta Sri Nityananda Kripa Shri murthaye
Tvam sakshat Sri Krishna Chaitanya Prema Bhakti Rasa Vigraha

Jayate Gouranga Prema Yuga Acharya Shiromani
Sri Gour Govinda Swami Gurudevaya Namo Namah!

Dearest Srila Gurudevaji,

Hare Krishna. All glories to Your Divine Grace Srila Gour Govinda Swami Srila Gurudeva.

Please accept my humble obeisances in the soft, sparkling, fragrant, tasty holy dust hovering beneath and around your two beautiful lotus feet. Hope all is excellent with you. You are very kind and very beautiful. You are joyful, brilliant and melodious. You are charming, humorous and all-attractive to the heart. How remarkable it is that even though you performed your stellar, glorious holy pastime of leaving this mortal world in a manner indicating the highest divinity on your part; that of falling into divine spiritual trance of devotion while speaking on the wonderful pastimes of Sri Sri Radha and Krishna uniting after a long separation, still you are manifesting Yourself more and more within this world solely for the sake of miserable, suffering jivas like me.

Some days i see a wonderful photograph of you i have never seen before. Where did it come from? Did it descend from the Spiritual Sky just now? (Srila Prabhupada does that too). Sometimes i read a lecture or see a video, like this one i have never seen before. New words and books are manifest about you. Your websites increase the ocean of blissful Krishna Katha spoken by you. Even those words and photos i have heard and seen many times appear completely new when i closely and carefully hear and see them again. Your holy dhams enact your loving pastimes with your devotees. i have felt you in Sri Vrindaban Dhama at your holy pushupa samadhi and in Atlanta, in Sri Gadei Giri and in Sri Bhubaneswar; sometimes even in home. Actually, you are ever-fresh, just like Lord Krishna. Newly, devotees are discovering you and taking shelter of your two beautiful lotus feet.

Dearest Srila Gurudeva, this is your wondrous miracle. If you keep this up, even against our most stubborn efforts to resist the mercy of Lord Jagannath and Sriman Mahaprabhu, you will definitely overcome our eternal causeless unwillingness and force us to become joyfully owned by you. You will simply naturally attract all souls to sincerely wish to become joyfully owned by you, dear patita pavana, Srila Gurudeva.

Please, in my case, try to find some way to make this happen sooner, Srila Gurudeva. Cat and monkey logic aside, all i can do is humbly and feelingly beg you on this most auspicious occasion of the anniversary of your apparent disappearance day, because my ability to do anything is completely absent. i am so sorry, it is a great shame to me, but it is the unpalatable truth. The hopeless cases you spoke about?..right here. Please, Srila Gurudeva, have pity on me. I am fallen on the ground with my head and hands touching your two soft, pinkish lotus feet. Please pick me up and favorably engage me in the association of your dearest loving servants.

Your lotus feet are beautiful
your lotus toes are beautiful
your lotus legs are beautiful
your lotus hands are beautiful
your lotus finger and toe nails are beautiful
your lotus arms, belly, chest, shoulders and head are all beautiful
your lotus face, smile and ever tear-decorated eyes are really beautiful
your garlands are beautiful
your prasadam is beautifully delicious
your cane and assistants are beautiful
your seats are beautiful
you are beautiful from the front
from the side
and from the back
you are beautiful when you are walking and rolling
when you are still
you are beautiful when you are smiling
when you are crying
when you are poking fun
when you are laughing
when you are scowling
when you are singing, oh, when you are thunderously calling with arms outstretched,
swaying side to side, melting stones.
you are beautiful when you are speaking
sitting, standing and dancing…
all your forms are fully beautiful, Srila Gurudeva
and what and how you speak is so beautiful too.

Srila Gurudeva, thank you for your books, your audio lectures and your videos. Thank you for your photographs, your Sri Murthi and amazing, kind, humble, generous devotees full of love and dedication to you. Especially thank you for your transcendental body and mood which you have not only left here but are distributing more and more. What an excellent plan! Please, Srila Gurudeva..continue to bless all souls to become helplessly, movingly attracted by you.

All glories to Sri Sri Radha Gopal Jiu, All glories to Lord Jagannath, Lady Subhadra and Lord Balaram. All glories to Sri Sri Gaura Nitai, His Divine Grace Srila Prabhupada, His Divine Grace Srila Bhaktisiddhanta Saraswati Thakurji and you.

Radhe! Radhe!

Much Love and all the best wishes always,
your servant’s servant’s servant’s servant’s maidservant, many times removed,
Rasamanjari Devi dasi

P. S. Srila Gurudeva, i contended for a week with this, condemning myself… i have no physical strength for service, no cleanliness, no regulation, no proper training nor steadiness in devotional practices. Being a westerner, a woman and fully in the clutches of Kali, i have only bad tendencies, association and habits. Words? What is the use of just words with no coresponding activity behind them? But, unlike all your other wonderful servants, who have so many nice talents, good qualities and sincere works, words are all that i have. Then, i thought of all the love stories in the word, how the lover tries to attract the beloved with words. Seems loving words have an important place in loving affairs after i felt a little hope. How, maybe, just maybe, if i could say the right words, at the right time…you’ll be mine.

Holy Appearance Day of Srila Bhaktisiddhanta Saraswati Thakur and Holy Disappearance Day of Srila Gour Govinda Swami Srila Gurudeva.
March 3, 2013